Guide to telescience

From /tg/station 13 wiki
Jump to: navigation, search
The following page is out of date and needs to be revised.
The revision reason is: "Out of date"

Welcome to Telescience, the room where you teleport things/people/bombs you aren't supposed to have into places said things/people/bombs aren't supposed to be, or use it for legitimate purposes.


The Guide to Telescience AKA Why Is There Math In My Game?

The Telescience Lab

Telescience is a single room at the south end of the Research department hallway.

This area focuses on teleportation, both sending and receiving. It is equipped with a Telepad, a secure room to teleport people and things in and out of, and several handheld GPS readers.

Telescience is imprecise, but potentially extremely useful. Try teleporting GPSs to see where they go, and then from there you can move objects or people back and forth from your lab. Like all science rooms, experimentation is key!

Holy Shit, I Will be the Ruler of Space and Time!

A word of warning. Telescience requires math. Of course, as a scientist, you have a good understanding of mathematical knowledge and projectile trajectory, right?

The telepad console has 4 variables that can be set:

  • Bearing (measured in degrees, can have a value from 0 to 360)
  • Elevation (measured in degrees, can have a value from 0 to 90)
  • Power (measured in integer units, can have a value from 5 to 100 provided you have enough Bluespace Crystals on hand, power levels from 5 to 25 are available by default)
  • Sector (defines the z-level which will be teleported to/from, default is 1, corresponding to the main station z-level).

Together, these 4 settings define the coordinates whatever or whoever is on the telepad will find themselves after you push the Send button on the console via the following equation



  • Tenth.png = The Telepad's X-coordinate
  • Eleventh.png = The Telepad's Y-coordinate
  • Eighteenth.png = Distance
  • Twentyeighth.png = Bearing

The value to use for distance can be found by using the equation



  • Twentyninth.png = Power
  • Thirtieth.png = Elevation

In dummytalk, Bearing specifies a direction from the telepad (with 0 being North, 90 - East, 180 - South and 270 - West) and Elevation and Power specify how far from the telepad the target will travel.

How to Rip a Hole in the Fabric of Space and Time Itself to Perform Useful Duties

First things first, the telepad needs to be linked to the Telepad Control Console. To do this you'll need a screwdriver and a multitool. Use the screwdriver on the telepad to remove the maintenance hatch, then use the multitool on the telepad to save it's linking data into the multitool buffer. Screw the maintenance hatch back in and then upload the telepad data to the control console by using the multitool on it.

At round start, the telepad will be calibrated. That means the following: the Bearing setting will be offset to a random value between -10 and 10 degrees, and the Power setting will be offset randomly from -4 to 0. At this point, there are somewhere between 30 and 40 uses before it will have to be re-calibrated. Every time the crystals are re-calibrated, the remaining uses until calibration is needed again will be a random number between 30 and 40. When recalibrating, the bearing and power offsets will be re-rolled. These values do not stack, so they will always be within these ranges. To find out these offsets, you will need those little gizmos called GPS. The round starts with a number of them on the table in the Telescience Lab. Grab two, place one on the telepad and the other in your pocket.

Global Positioning System
Global Positioning System

Now this next part requires some math and a calculator supporting square roots and inverse trigonometric functions, specifically asin() and atan(). If you're incapable of math, ask yourself what the hell are you doing in the Research Division of the most high-tech space station ever built, and apply to Head of Personnel for the Clown's job.

First, let's find the power offset. It is most simply done by setting elevation to 45. Elevation set to 45 sets the Third.png to 1 so the equation for the distance simplifies to Fourth.png. For example if you teleport something with power 20, it should be Fifth.png or 40 tiles away. That's where the power offset comes in, as the GPS will actually be in Sixth.png, so, using the previous example and if the offset is, Say, -4, the GPS will be actually Seventh.png or 25.6 -- rounded to 26 -- tiles away. So, to find out the power offset, you need to teleport the GPS with 45 elevation and see how far away it actually flies. Let's designate the GPS coordinates as Eigth.png and Ninth.png, and the telepad coordinates as Tenth.png and Eleventh.png. Then the formula for the distance from the telepad to the GPS is


and the equation for actually finding the offset is


So, to recollect, to find the power offset you need to:

  • Teleport the GPS with settings 0 bearing, 45 elevation, 20 power.
  • Using another GPS find out how far did it go in both x and y directions (say, it travelled Eigth.png tiles on x axis and Ninth.png on y axis).
  • Calculate the distance from the telepad to the GPS as Sixteenth.png
  • Multiply it by 10 and extract square root.
  • What you see at your calc now is power minus offset. As the power was set to 20, to find offset, you need to subtract the number you've got from 20. So, for example, if you got roughly 17, the offset is 3 (remember it can be only integer).

Now, to find the bearing offset. When you teleported the GPS, you might've noticed it didn't go precisely north, although the bearing was set to 0. The bearing offset is to blame. Once again, assume the GPS travelled Eigth.png tiles west and Ninth.png tiles north. Then, by dividing Eigth.png by Ninth.png, you get the tangent of the offset angle, and the angle itself can be calculated as Seventeenth.png (it's also integer, so feel free to round). Given the GPS travelled west, that will be a positive offset that will be added to your bearing, so you have to compensate by substracting it from the bearing you will be setting. Inversly, if the GPS has gone east, the offset is negative and you need to add it to the bearing.

Congratulations! Now that you know both offsets, you can teleport anything with some deadly precision or steal some high-secure items in the most stealthy fashion without having anyone see the GPS tools dancing around! So, how do you put that knowledge to use? Let's assume you want to teleport something Eigth.png tiles west and Ninth.png tiles north. First, you again need to find the distance as Sixteenth.png (let's designate it Eighteenth.png). Now, set the power setting so that Sixth.png (let's designate that number as Nineteenth.png) was greater than your distance. (If you can't, you need to find you more bluespace crystals). Now, once the power is set, you need to adjust the bearing. Divide D by Dmax. As Dmax is greater, you'll get a number less than 1. You need to calculate the inverse sine from that number and then divide it by 2. In one formula,


Your bearing is the next item on the agenda to calculate. This is the angle at which we want to send something, and where trigonometry comes in handy. If you aren't familiar with trigonometry then that's fine, this section will hopefully simplify the explanation.

For starters you will need both your Eigth.png and your Ninth.png value. To demonstrate what we are looking at, we'll place them on a unit circle like so


We're looking for Twentysixth.png, which represents our bearing. For those of you familiar with trig, you'll know we have to use Twentyfirst.png if our slope is positive (quadrant one, northeast, or quadrant three, southwest). Otherwise you'll use Twentysecond.png if your target is in quadrant two or fourth (northwest or southeast respectively). However, you'll notice that theta is restricted to quadrant one (northeast) only in our picture above. If we want to send it any of the other directions, we're going to have to add a degree offset to determine which quadrant we are trying to send it to. We can add 90 degrees to our results to move one quadrant over. You can think of this as moving clockwise each time we add 90 degrees. So:

  • To send north and east, don't add anything.
  • To send south and east, add 90.
  • To send south and west, add 180.
  • To send north and west, add 270.

Now compensate for the bearing offset, punch those numbers in the computer and hit that Send (or Receive) button! If you're not miscalculated and everything was done right, you should now have DAT FUKKEN DISK on the telepad or a maximum-yield bomb at the AI core. Enjoy your near-omnipotence, you've truly deserved it.

Bluespace Crystal
Bluespace Crystal

Sadly, every 30 to 40 teleportations (roughly) the Telepad will fizzle. This means you need to click Recalibrate and start from step 1. Learn to recalibrate quickly, or you may end up in a heap of trouble.

Leave handy beacons around the station, and GPS units at interesting locations in space, and you can easily find them again. It's worth putting something down in the Medbay so you can quickly send the wounded and the dead there.

Also, note that the maximum radius you can reach is proportional to power squared, so, with so much as three or four extra crystals, your reach extends immensely. Just insert them into the console and higher power will become available. This also amplifies the recharge time between teleports and the energy the telepad consumes from the room's APC.

Challenges for the Robust in All of Us

  1. Be useful and teleport dead bodies to Genetics for cloning, or injured crew straight to Medbay for treatment!
  2. Teleport an Engineering Cyborg straight to a hull breach!
  3. Borrow all the Chef's donuts!
  4. Teleport the last remaining revhead into the Brig for implanting!
  5. Find the remaining Bananium ore and construct a H.O.N.K. mech for the Clown!
  6. Teleport the Nuclear Device around during a Nuclear Operatives -round! Bonus points if it's right after they stick in DAT FUKKEN DISK and before they input the code! Double bonus points for teleporting it to the derelict!
  7. Teleport a bomb onto a malfunctioning AI's core!
  8. Teleport the WGW reader into LORD SINGULOTH!